When I am all alone

I am all alone.

It is an early-childhood feeling. It is the feeling that no one wants to play with me. No one wants to sit with me at lunch. That I’ll be the last one to be sorted into a kickball team. I always was.

It is the feeling that everyone has their own friends, except for me.

It is the feeling that the people I value as friends don’t think of me the same way.

And that the people that do value me as a friend don’t really want to talk to me because they need some time to cool off.

It is the feeling that everyone thinks I’m too clingy and sassy and annoying, when all I want is someone to talk to. Because everyone else is busy with their own schedules.

It is the feeling that when I try to talk to people, they snap at me saying, “Can I talk to this person over here? Bye!”

Most of the time, this feeling is dormant. Sometimes it resurfaces for good reason, and other times it resurfaces on perfectly fine days. Today it woke up and yawned and screamed and tied me up and took a hammer to my poor head.

Advertisements

5 thoughts on “When I am all alone

  1. I have those feelings all the time, and it sucks. I’m sorry you had to go through that today. I don’t wish it on anyone. I hope it goes away soon for you, and just so you know it’s not true. If it means anything, I don’t feel that way 🙂

    Like

Before commenting, see the comment guidelines below.

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s